Not an infidelity post, but something a reader wanted to post. I was lucky in that I have never had friends who have supported cheating the way my ex wife’s friends and family did.
If you needed a ride to the airport, whom would you call? A friend? A family member? A trusted neighbor? You’re lucky.
Do you want to know who I’d call? A taxi. Or I’d pick up my phone and order an Uber driver or a Lyft driver on an app like I was ordering a pizza. The last time I needed a ride, I put my life in the hands of a virtual stranger. The driver could have been a madman, or on drugs, or a criminal, or drunk. I just don’t know. But I didn’t have a choice. I don’t have the kind of true friends I can just call when I need a ride.
In fact, most people don’t really have any true friends to help them out when needed. Social media connects us to all sorts of people with whom we can touch base and even share valuable information from time to time, but it’s not the same as having a true friend that you can call on for help.
I’ve come to the realization that most people in life have no real friends. No confidants. No shoulder to lean on when things get difficult. This is a harsh judgment, but it’s based on my own experience living as an adult with few close friends. It’s been exhausting, and I’m sure most people feel similarly.
Some people take for granted having plenty of friends. Not me. The fact is I don’t have a single friend in my phone that I could call or text if I needed a ride to the airport without a second thought. And you know what? That’s not just true of me, it’s true of most people. They don’t have a friend they can ask for a ride to the airport.
To be fair, I am not the kind of friend who will drive you to the airport, either. So I guess I am getting as good as I give. If reciprocity is the name of the game, then I am failing the game.I have family. I have a couple of friends. But I don’t have any drive-you-to-the-airport-in-the-middle-of-the-night friends. I don’t say this in order to gain sympathy or empathy. It just happens to be true.
Asking my family for a ride to the airport would happen only if the following criteria were met: (1) The airport was on fire, and (2) They were standing outside of it holding a flaming torch and wearing their fireman uniforms. With the idea that my friends would be the next closest choice, let me say just how much of a crapshoot it would be to ask them for help.
I’ve pondered on this for years. I mean, you have to trust a friend with your car keys, right? I’ve asked myself that question often: suppose your car won’t start and you need a ride to the airport (70 miles away), who are you going to call? Your neighbor or best friend? Not me.
What if you’re “that friend” who is always asking for favors. Would they help? If you asked most people if they have a friend who would help them move to the next city, be there for them when they move in, or take care of them when they’re sick, the answer would probably be no. We’ve created an illusion of “social life” on Facebook and other platforms but unlike the past where we actually had to talk to people in person. Nowadays. we click on a “like” button to tell somebody that we like their post, and we read and comment on a lot of things online, but very seldom is it a meaningful interaction.